Nowadays, technology is increasingly being used to monitor what people are saying and doing. In many cases, the people being monitored are unaware that this is happening. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

#technology #people #cases #development

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There is no doubt that these days, technology and modernity

has

Correct subject-verb agreement

have

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made an

advance

Replace the word

advanced

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transformation across the globe. Most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Sophisticated

Add an article

the Sophisticated

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devices have the allowance to observe

peoples

Change noun form

people's

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activity and private information,

this

Linking Words

feature leads to positive consequences.

Linking Words

However

Add a comma

,However

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also

Linking Words

caused a plethora of demerits. In

this

Linking Words

essay I am going to discuss both perspectives, eventually, I will draw my own conclusion. On the one hand, in terms of the benefits of

monitor

Replace the word

monitoring

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people through the network.

Firstly

Linking Words

, Supervising help in finding escaped dangerous criminals.

Moreover

Linking Words

, assist in

crimes

Fix the agreement mistake

crime

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or burglary

preventing

Replace the word

prevention

show examples

Secondly

Linking Words

, people who used

internet

Correct article usage

the internet

show examples

should be observed to help them to find their device in case they lost it. As a shining example,

last

Linking Words

month I lost my I phone and I found it

Change preposition

through

show examples

a mobile app called find your phone. On the other flip of the coin, a negative side of

this

Linking Words

feature has shown. Lack of privacy like location or financial information could be exposed to others or

Hacking

Wrong verb form

Hacked

show examples

Unfortunately

Add a comma

,Unfortunately

show examples

this

Linking Words

cause

Change the verb form

causes

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a significant rising in burglary and embezzlement rates.

For instance

Linking Words

, a recent study

has

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

published by king Saud University estimated that individuals who exposed their own data on social media platforms like Facebook and

twitter

Change the capitalization

Twitter

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have a high risk of getting larceny. In conclusion,

Linking Words

although

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

monitoring and detecting peoples' data could be useful in

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

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numerous situations.

However

Linking Words

, a plethora of disadvantages

has

Change the verb form

have

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been observed among communities.

Therefore

Linking Words

, I strongly believe privacy lacking is more dangerous and outweigh the benefits. Government must ensure steps are taken to prevent

this

Linking Words

action from deteriorating our future.

Submitted by hno_aaa on Tue Aug 09 2022

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

263 words

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Nowadays, technology is increasingly being used to monitor what people are saying and doing. In many cases, the people being monitored are unaware that this is happening. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

'Is it important to be ethical all the time.' What are the advantages and disadvantages of being ethical all the time?

Humans have made a great technological process in the last hundred years. However, this progress has negative effects on people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Sea Glider Shows Underwater Potential what it mean?

As major cities around the world are growing , so are their problems .what are these problems for young people lives in cities ?what are possible solutions for these problems .