IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

In recent years, the family structure and the role of its members are gradually changing. What kinds of change have occurred? Do you think these changes are positive and negative?

#years #structure #role #members #kinds #change #changes
Nowadays,It has seen the switch roles among family characters ,
for example
,the majority of wife duties have been divided between men and women,
although
 ,these new actions might build more gender equality in society It is inevitable
this
 new behaviour
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 a source of controversies among families ,
although
 ,in my viewpoint,there are many pros than cons for a nation in related
this
 evolution ,so, I am going to bring some piece of evidence to clarify my opinion. In a beginning , men have more benefits from new arranging responsibilities among all family members ,because ,they will sense less stress on their minds for managing their families and have more time to invest in their desired activities ,
as a result
 ,they will become
more happy
Replace the words
happier
show examples
 in their life ,alongside,females can get a dilemma for growing their weaknesses in career positions and become an effective person in their community ,
in addition
 to, youngers will have a wise mother, and spend much time with their own father and learn much lessons to deal with their future problematic situations ,so all above, It will create more prosperous individuals.
However
,
this
 new settlement might be a source of some conflict among family members and It could increase the possibility of divorce rate ,
nevertheless
 ,people must respect others' rights and let them that will experience new roles in considering
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
some negative issues,
for example
, rich husbands would prefer their wives stay at homes and do housework ,but, women need to get own identity in all parts of a community . To sum up, policymakers must combat these tackles by educating their nation that the society could be flourished on new characteristics in a family , so , I believe these new changes will bring more prosperity for humans,because ,they can become anyone that they have desired.
Submitted by homa.ebrahimi987 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!