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Band 7

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

#cultures #children #message
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It is common that adults to encourage their children to achieve their goals by exerting full efforts, which makes sense because no pain no gain, while some argue that endeavour is not the only factor in success. For my part, I side with the opponents that the demerits of
this
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 behaviour surpass the merits. For one thing, there is no target that you can meet without working hard. To be specific, during the process of growing up, children basically totally rely on their parents to get what they want, and that's the reason why it is necessary for them to learn to exert their own efforts to earn things.
Moreover
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, the most important lesson for today's young generation is about suffering hardship because the material-enrichment modern life is so convenient that kids can easily get what they want and be spoiled. For another, success is the combination of various factors
besides
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 making efforts.
For instance
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, patience, carefulness and courage are
also
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 precious qualities to get things done, which kids need to acquire.
Otherwise
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, children can get frustrated and feel unfair when they find out that even if they try their best they still could fail. Having the knowledge of the complexity and uncertainty of achievement can help immature minors build a proper attitude to face their failure. To sum it up, it is crucial for kids to learn the importance of endeavour and become hard-working adults, but I myself hold a firm belief that minors should
also
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 be aware that they still need other qualities to attain their goals.
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • achieve
  • try hard
  • positive mindset
  • self-belief
  • motivates
  • ambitious goals
  • resilience
  • determination
  • confidence
  • self-esteem
  • growth mindset
  • unrealistic expectations
  • disappointment
  • failure
  • effort
  • hard work
  • seek support
  • individual differences
  • abilities
  • capabilities
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