prison is the common way in most countries to solve the roblem of crime.However,a more effective solution is to provide people a better education. Do you agree or disagree?

#prison #countries #roblem #crime #people #education

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Crime

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has been the major concern of many countries across the world. In the efforts to reduce the

crime

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rate

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, some

people

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believe that retaining in jail is an effective way to alleviate the problem, while others including me reckon that

education

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is a more promising solution to a dramatical increase in the

crime

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rate

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. In

this

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essay, the reasons to support my agreement with the latter statement will be presented before my conclusion is reached.

Although

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prison could transform offenders into good guys back to society, there are various competent methods that are more effective, and one of them is providing better

education

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. Schools and universities do not only provide students with beneficial knowledge and useful skills, but they

also

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teach the art of living and cultivate the attitude to be good citizens. According to the statistics data from Royal Thai Police, more than 80 per cent of inmates who commit a

crime

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, are uneducated

people

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, which do not even study high school.

Therefore

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education

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can discourage individuals to commit a

crime

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Furthermore

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, as the main reason for crimes is poverty, famine, and low quality of life, the number of criminal case steadily rise because they have to steal money from others to survive.

However

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education

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can improve human well-being as

people

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can get the opportunity to get better jobs or well-paid work with a higher degree of study.

As a result

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people

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have a better life and do not need to be involved in illegal activities.

For example

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, the corruption

rate

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in undeveloped countries including Brazil, Srilanka, and Myanmar is enormously higher than in developed countries

such

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as the European states, America, and England because the livelihood in civilized nations is already good. In conclusion, providing citizens with the proper learning is more competent to declining the criminal

rate

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than retaining the prisoners in jail according to the aforementioned reasons. Presumably, I absolutely agree with the

second

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statement.

Moreover

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, the authority should focus on study than punishment.

Submitted by pantamitsaekong on Wed Aug 24 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

329 words

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prison is the common way in most countries to solve the roblem of crime.However,a more effective solution is to provide people a better education. Do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Advances in computer technology allow young adults to work from home and children to study at home. Do you think this is a positive or negative change? Write at least 250 words.

Topic: Millions of dollars are spent on space research every year. Some people argue that the money should be spent on improving living standards on Earth. Do you agree or disagree?

1.Many companies sponsor sports as a way of advertising themselves. Some people think this is good for the world of sport, while others think it is negative. discus both views and give your opinion

Living in a a country where you have to speak foreign Language can cause serious social. problems, as well as practical problems. To What extent do you agree or dis agrees

in some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. why might be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation.