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Band 7

In most countries, prison is the most common solution when people commit a crime. However, if they were to receive better education, it could prevent them from becoming criminals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#countries #prison #people #crime #education #criminals
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How to prevent crime is one of the major concern topics in modern society. While putting
criminals
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 into prisons works to a certain degree, my view is that
education
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 is a more helpful way to reduce the number of
criminals
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. It is clear that individuals who have received
education
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 have better financial conditions.
This
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 is because they are more likely to find a good pay job so that being able to afford their living expense. So, the possibility of breaking the law to make money will decline significantly.
Moreover
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,
education
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 can change the environment of individuals by providing them with the same level of friends.
For example
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, if you attend university, you would find that the people surrounding you are all well educated. Having educated friends
instead
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 of ones who are involved in gambling and drugs is important to decline the chance to commit offences.
Nevertheless
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, those who harbour the view that
criminals
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 should be put into prison believe that only
this
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 way can warn the public since no one wants to lose freedom. The
criminals
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, of course, should be isolated from citizens in order to prevent them hurt the public again. But
education
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 is a more effective way to prevent crimes since monitoring the
criminals
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 needs a lot of money. In conclusion, as far as finance, environment and effectiveness are concerned, I strongly hold that instruction play a key part in reducing the crime rate. Meanwhile, we should not ignore the important role laws are undertaking. Only by doing so can society become more peaceful and safe.
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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