Some people think that work is the most important thing of people's life. Without the success of a career, life becomes meaningless. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #work #life #success #career

It is undeniable that

work

is one of the most essential parts of a human being’s life.

Therefore

, many

people

believe that their life will become nothing if they do not succeed in their careers. I partly disagree with

this

idea since there are several other factors that are crucial for humanity. On the one hand, admittedly,

work

is very pivotal to everyone.

Firstly

, by working,

people

can enhance many fundamental skills and improve their knowledge in their field.

That is

to say,

this

will make

people

either emerge their full potential or discover new breakthroughs in certain subjects which they have already mastered.

Secondly

, they can earn money to support not only their own livelihood but

also

their families. Ultimately, albeit some

people

, especially scientists or the affluent ones, are not money-oriented, they still

work

passionately and diligently towards their goals to show their abilities and earn respect from other

people

simply just to desire to find something new for the human race. Najwa Shihab, a well-known Indonesian journalist,

for example

, has thought that she works just for war against justice in Indonesia's political world regardless of the wages she got.

On the other hand

, from my perspective, health

also

is a thing that should not be neglected. Obviously, we cannot

work

well with poor health.

Thus

, the performance of a person who gets a fatal disease will be affected a lot.

Moreover

, if most

people

just focus on

work

, one day they will get seriously sick, which might lead to a burden for their families. In 2016, research results released by the Indonesian Epidemic Journal Center showed that there is a significant number of workers suffering from various diseases reaching about 70%, and

this

number has been increasing year by year.

Consequently

, not only they will be affected but

also

others who take care of them. In conclusion,

although

I admit that having a successful job is the top priority of each individual's goals, we should

also

be more careful about our health to make our life better.

Submitted by IELTS_8 on Mon Sep 12 2022

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

340 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that work is the most important thing of people's life. Without the success of a career, life becomes meaningless. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Many today feel that attention spans are becoming shorter due to the prevalence of social media. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

More and more people in developed countries are purchasing cars for the first time. What problem dose this cause? What do you think is a possible solution?

In order to reduce crime, we need to attack the causes of crime such as poverty and lack of educational opportunities. It is enough to simply have more police on the street and put more people into prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Many people choose natural healing methods, such as acupuncture and massage therapy to recover from illness. Others prefer to use pharmaceutical drugs prescribe by their doctor for their aliments.