IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Some people think that all teenagers should be required to do unpaid work in their free time to help the local community. They believe this would benefit both the individual teenager and society as a whole. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #teenagers #work #time #community #teenager #society
Many youngsters
work
 on a volunteer basis, and
this
 can truly be conducive for both the community and themself;
however
, from my perspective, I disagree with the viewpoint that all teenagers should be forced to do unpaid
work
 in their leisure time. One evident reason that supports my idea is that students are already stressed and tired enough during their school hours;
therefore
 , they should be allowed to rest and enjoy their leisure time in lieu of being asked to do unpaid
work
. Forcing students to do
such
work
 might
further
 enhance their burden and even lead to a reduction in their academic performance. Another problem is that inefficient
work
 can be anticipated. To exemplify, It can be easily envisaged that people who are compelled to do
work
 against their will are liable to end up inefficiently;
moreover
,
this
 action can even exacerbate the relationship between the adolescents and the local community, eventually reaching the outcome which is against the initial expectation. People who stand on the opposite side might contend that youngsters can cultivate a sense of responsibility through
work
 on a volunteer basis.
This
 can be sensible in some aspects;
however
, except for being forced to do unpaid
work
, there are still other gateways for the young to attain the same effect.
For example
, it is
also
 an act of responsibility for some teenagers who manage their own time to do part-time jobs to support their tuition or personal expenses and ameliorate their families' economical condition. In conclusion, I disagree with the view that young people should be required to do unpaid
work
 as many drawbacks can be anticipated. The meaning of volunteer
work
 would be conducive for both sides only if it is not against any individual’s will.
Submitted by erichappykimo on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: