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Writing Samples
Band 7

In some countries, it is possible for people to have a variety of food that has been transported from all over the world. To what extent do you think its benefits outweigh the drawbacks?

#countries #people #variety #food #world
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Some
people
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 believe importing
food
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 from other countries is beneficial for their country's economic development and maintaining a stable
food
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 price for citizens. In my opinion, I agree with
this
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 idea. The advantages of importing products and goods outweigh the disadvantages.
To begin
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 with, it is undeniable that there are more choices for citizens to choose their edible
foods
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 when the government allows
people
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 to get
foods
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 from different countries.
For instance
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,
people
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 living in Europe can enjoy coconut and tropical fruits at home,
while
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 Mid-Asian
people
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 can buy fish in the supermarket. At the same time, importing
food
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 from all over the world means that
people
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 can have access to a lower price of a particular
food
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 in some regions.
In contrast
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,
people
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 pay a lot to buy fruits and vegetables in Japan
due to
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 the limitation of imported
foods
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.
On the other hand
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, the development of imports
also
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 can promote the domestic economy through citizens' consumption.
In other words
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, providing more products means that there are more possibilities to increase
people
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's desires. If there is no
food
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 commerce in the world, we might choose to plant
foods
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 by ourselves or exchange
foods
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 with our neighbours. Undoubtedly, the economy would not be prosperous if we all lived in
such
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 conditions.
However
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, there are still some shortcomings.,like domestic Farmers have more competition, they even need to sacrifice their benefits to occupy the market. In a nutshell,
although
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 some shortcomings still exist, I believe the benefits outweigh the drawbacks because of the lower price of
food
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 and the development of the social economy. .
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task response
Develop your ideas in more depth and provide more specific examples to support your points.
coherence and cohesion
You have shown a good understanding of how to structure an essay, but ensure that your ideas flow more smoothly from one to the next.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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