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Writing Samples
Band 7

Raising household electricity fees is the most effective solution to the problems associated with power generation and environmental pollution. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective in reducing the environmental pollution caused by power generation?

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These days, to tackle the issues relevant to environmental contamination and
power
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 generation, the most effective measure is increasing domestic
electricity
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. The reason for
this
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 varies. In my opinion,
this
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 is a matter of debate in light of different factors before any conclusion can be drawn From my perspective, raising household
electricity
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 is not the only solution to save the environment.
To begin
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 with, citizens are suffering numerous day-to-day expenses from tuition fees for the children to taxes to the cost of the commute.
Therefore
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, if domestic
electricity
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 grows, it would create a greater financial burden for humans and
also
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 contribute to the standard of living of people who are underprivileged.
Moreover
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, the main
energy
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 consumers are factories and businesses, which
use
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 large
electricity
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 every day. The residential only a small part of overall
energy
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use
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.
For instance
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, in the United States, the consumption of
energy
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 for industrial and commercial activities is higher than when compared with residential
energy
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use
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 that more than 50% and 30% of
energy
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use
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, respectively. So increasing the cost of household
energy
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 is not reasonable and equal for citizens. There are numerous measures to resolve
this
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 problem without increasing
energy
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 costs.
First
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, humans should be raised awareness about
use
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 the of electric vehicles and shared mobility to reduce air pollution. Take Denmark as a good example, the human in
this
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 nation are using bicycles and carpooling, which is not only economical but
also
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 protect our environment.
Furthermore
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, the government should encourage factories to
use
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 clean and renewable
energy
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such
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 as water, solar, and wind
power
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.
For example
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, Korean industrials are an incentive that converts
power
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 supply to renewable sources and boosts green
power
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use
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 In conclusion, I significantly disagree with an increase in the fee for household
electricity
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, which contributes to a greater financial burden on citizens. Whereas, the government can apply different measures
such
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 as using renewable
energy
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. In order to address the aforementioned issue we need a joint effort of both governments and individuals.

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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