It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #risks #lives

It is significant for people to take

risks

in their careers as well as in their personal lives.

Although

this

can bring harmful

risks

that cannot return.

However

this

can change the opportunities, and I believe

this

advantage far outweighs any disadvantages. Making a risk may bring big disadvantages.

For example

, adults who are living with their parents because they receive financial support from their parents. If they stop getting support from their parents, they can be free to go forward with their dreams, they may face the downside of losing the comfort of their parent's financial support.

However

, I do not think that a small sacrifice should be seen as a big disadvantage in life because it can pay off in the future. On the positive side,

risks

bring opportunities.

For instance

, in the Korean idol group Black Pink, Jennie is the rapper among

this

group. She graduated from elementary to middle school in LA. After graduating the middle school, her family planned to go to Canada.

However

, she had a dream to be a singer in

Korea

. It is hard to succeed as an idol in

Korea

, but she took the risk of giving up her studies and went back to

Korea

to audition for an agency. Eventually, she became the best idol in

Korea

, and if she hadn't taken the risk, she would have been living a different life. In conclusion,

although

taking

risks

may be difficult and cannot return, I believe the

risks

they take can create life-changing opportunities for them.

Submitted by doeun4652 on Tue Oct 25 2022

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

255 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Opportunities
Growth
Innovation
Challenges
Self-discovery
Resilience
Uncertainty
Consequences
Calculated risks
Stagnation
Regret
Comfort zone
Entrepreneurship
Adventurous spirit
Thriving
Failure
Mitigate
Reap the rewards

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It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Many people today are worried about the large quantities of waste produced by ordinary households. What problems are caused by household waste? What are the solution?

Governments should spend money on railways than roads. To what to extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people think that government should spend money on building new train lines,while others believe that improving public transport is more beneficial.Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.