With the improvements in today’s health care, society has to care for more and more elderly people. Do you feel that society will be able to cope with the increase in numbers of elderly people today and how can it be managed? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#improvements #today’s #health #care #society #people #numbers

As life expectancy is going high, the majority of the

population

is becoming elderly. In

this

situation, the elderly

population

should be obviously paid more attention to for some reasons. In

this

essay, I will discuss why laws and facilities for the elderly are necessary for society.

To begin

with, there are some reasons why elderly people should be treated carefully.

Firstly

, since there have been great technological advances at the moment, all people are expected to live longer. What it means is that the average age of the public is going to be older. If

this

population

is ignored and unattended, they will be much more likely to suffer from severe illnesses and diseases, exposed to a higher chance of getting sick. As the majority of the

population

, whether they are healthy and productive or unhealthy and non-productive will probably bring a huge gap in the future.

Furthermore

, many ways to support the old can be thought about.

First

and foremost, considering the fact that seniors are veterans in many different kinds of industrial fields, we could make a great amount of financial revenue by producing more jobs for those.

In addition

, they might be able to play the role of teachers or assistants for beginners in their fields. As far as health is concerned, the government can decline the old's health insurance and build more medical facilities in which they can get treatment at a reasonable price. To conclude, since I believe there are still a number of significant roles the elderly can play in the community, it is of great importance to prepare for the future in which the rate of the old

population

will increase.

As a result

, our future could be a step

further

to a better world.

Submitted by johndaegeun on Thu Oct 27 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

293 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

food can be produced much more cheaply today because of improved fertilizers and better machinery. however ,some of the method used to do this may be dangerous to human health and may have negative effects on local communities to what extent do you you agree or disagree?

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. More and more people are buying food that is ready to eat rather than choosing to eat home-cooked food. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Some scientists believe that studying 3-year-old children can predict their criminality. To what extent do you think a crime is a product of human nature or is it possible to stop children from growing up to be criminals?