You work for an international company. You want to attend special family celebration during working hours. You need to take time off work for this. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter: Give details of family celebration. Tell your manager how much time time off work you need. Suggest how work can be done while you attend the celebration.

Dear Sir

Correct word choice

show examples

Madam, I am writing to inform you about the family celebration. My mother is going to turn 60 years old

this

Linking Words

June 16.

Therefore

Linking Words

, I would like to celebrate her birthday.

In addition

Linking Words

, her relatives would reunite

this

Linking Words

time. It would be enjoyable and fun.

Firstly

Linking Words

, I would like to take four days off work. Because

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

I have to prepare the party and cook for my family.

Moreover

Linking Words

, it could be held in the Philippines. My flight is taking off on June 14 in the moring and I am going back to Japan on June 17 at night.

Lastly

Linking Words

, I already told my coworkers about it.

In addition

Linking Words

, I have already prepared some important papers to take over easily. If some problems were to happen, I would deal with the problems

Change preposition

apply

show examples

there

and

Punctuation problem

, and

show examples

I would work overtime after I came back to Japan. I hope you could reply to my message as soon as possible. Yours sincerely, Kazuya Nakagawa

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Mar 16, 2026

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task response

Task response: Answer all 3 points more clearly. Say what the party is, when it is, and why you must be there.

task response

Task response: Use a more polite tone for a manager. Write 'Dear Manager' or the name, not 'Dear Sir, Madam'.

coherence and cohesion

Coherence and cohesion: Link ideas in a smoother way. Do not start a sentence with 'Because' after a full stop.

coherence and cohesion

Coherence and cohesion: Keep one main idea in each part: celebration, time off, and work plan.

task response

Task response: You covered all 3 points from the question.

coherence and cohesion

Coherence and cohesion: The letter has a clear start, middle, and end.

coherence and cohesion

Coherence and cohesion: Words like 'Firstly', 'Moreover', and 'Lastly' help guide the reader.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

7 paragraphs

162 words

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