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Band 6.5

It is common practice for some students to take a gap year after graduating high school to work and/or travel. What do you think are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

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It is usual among a few
students
Use synonyms
that
Correct word choice
apply
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they take a small break before joining
college
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instead
Linking Words
 they work or
travelling
Wrong verb form
travel
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. The main
benefits
Fix the agreement mistake
benefit
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 of
this
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is
Change the verb form
are
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 they can earn money for
college
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 fees and gain knowledge;
however
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, the key drawback of
this
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 is they lose interest in
studies
Correct pronoun usage
their studies
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 and earn less in future. I think that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. There are
few
Correct article usage
a few
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 benefits of having a gap
in
Change preposition
apply
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between school and
college
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.
Students
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 can do some part-time jobs and earn money in order to reduce
burden
Add an article
the burden
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for
Change preposition
on
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 parents.
In addition
Linking Words
 to
this
Linking Words
, most of the
students
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 travel during
this
Linking Words
 time and gain knowledge about the neighbouring countries.
For example
Linking Words
, In the United
States
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,States
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 most of the small restaurants are filled with teenagers after completing schooling stated that they earn money to pay their
college
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 fees. Apart from the
advantages
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,advantages
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 there are
Correct article usage
a
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few
Correct your spelling
disadvantages
disavantages
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disadvantages
 like interest
on
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in
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 education might reduce as they feel lazy again to study and attend exams.
Also
Linking Words
, once they start earning and living on their own they might feel
this
Linking Words
 is enough for their life. As result, they get paid less because they don't have any degree in getting
a
Correct article usage
the
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 highest paid jobs.
For instance
Linking Words
, In South
Africa
Add a comma
,Africa
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 the percentage of
students
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 completing schooling is not even close to the percentage of people who joined colleges. To conclude, It is common for a few
students
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 to take a break before joining
further
Linking Words
 studies. I think that the disadvantages outweigh the benefits because they
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
 like to continue their studies and end up getting less-paid jobs even though they get job experience and pay their own fees.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • personal development
  • real-world experience
  • self-awareness
  • independence
  • broaden one’s horizons
  • cultural understanding
  • financial management
  • academic momentum
  • derailing
  • financial strain
  • out of sync
  • social relationships
  • career choices
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