With increased of global demand of oil and gas, undiscovered areas of the world should be opened up to access more resources. To what extent do you agree?

In the whole world
needs
Fix the agreement mistake
need
show examples
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
gas
and oil
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
growing day by day and the regions that are still not discovered with more possessing should shard to get these things. I completely agree with
this
opinion and
this
essay will show the economic point of view of a
country
and how
much upgraded
Add a hyphen
much-upgraded
show examples
machineries
Change the wording
machinery
types of machinery
pieces of machinery
show examples
is useful. To commence with, there are many poor countries in the world with a lot of
source
Fix the agreement mistake
sources
show examples
of oil and
gas
that are still not invented because of their lack of knowledge about
this
, and the economic situation of that
country
is
also
not that
much
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
high so it was difficult for them to start these process of discoveries.
For instance
, Burundi is a small, poor
country
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
Africa and they had a ton of
sources
in that case if any
first level
Add a hyphen
first-level
show examples
country
like America and Australia etc. if
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can come forward to open up these resources from Burundi
then
it will be a great scope to solve
this
consistency.
Secondly
, for lacking
of
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
upgraded
equipment’s
Change noun form
equipment
show examples
many more
medium range
Add a hyphen
medium-range
show examples
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
could not release these
sources
that are already discovered.
For example
, Bangladesh is a developing
country
and there are recently some
gas
sources
found in
village
Correct article usage
the village
show examples
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
but they could not derive it. If it is possible to manage or import any
kinds
Fix the agreement mistake
kind
show examples
of upgrade machine for collecting these resources,
then
obviously that will be
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
get support to solve
Add an article
a problem
the problem
show examples
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
related to that issue. To conclude, for solving the need that
Correct article usage
an increased
show examples
increased
Replace the word
increase
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
oil and
gas
can be solved by providing
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
economical support to poor
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
by
rich
Correct article usage
the rich
show examples
where there is a source
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
another option is by using
some
Correct determiner usage
an
show examples
upgraded
machine
Fix the agreement mistake
machines
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
is possible to release some
sources
that are already discovered.
Submitted by koly2751 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • global demand
  • finite resources
  • energy consumption
  • exploiting
  • untouched ecosystems
  • carbon emissions
  • climate change
  • renewable energy
  • sustainable energy solutions
  • geopolitical consequences
  • territorial disputes
  • dependency
What to do next:
Look at other essays: