in some cultures children are taught by their parents that they can achieve anything with hard work what are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend

#cultures #children #parents #work #trend

Nowadays children grow up in a competitive environment.

As a result

, guardians, in some cultures, believe hard

work

is the key to success. I will explain not only the pros but

also

the cons, along with reasons and examples.

Firstly

, It is only through repeated practice that certain qualities in an individual emerge.

Moreover

, just having theoretical knowledge is not sufficient. To elucidate, if humans learn specific skills only once, they will only be well versed with the basic concepts;

however

this

might not be

second-nature

Correct your spelling

second nature

show examples

. Incessant practice stimulates intuition, and is

therefore

Add the comma(s)

,therefore

show examples

, advantageous.

Secondly

, it has been observed that achieving positive outcomes through hard

work

develops a sense of motivation in humans.

For example

, the Japanese worked hard to reincarnate their nation after America dispatched nuclear bombs. Today, Japan proves to be a country with the highest motivated individuals.

Conversely

, working too hard leads to fatigue. If children

work

for excessive hours, they may get tired.

Furthermore

, they may undergo stress due to constant decision-making. Stress is harmful to both; the mind as well as body.

Lastly

, we should

also

strive to be happy. If pupils

work

continuously, they may feel emotionally withdrawn which is conspicuously a negative aspect.

In addition

, it is necessary to spend enjoyable time with friends and family. To illustrate, novices who spent fun time with their neighbours had a higher intelligence quotient, according to a survey in New Zealand. To sum up,

although

constantly learning and trying to achieve merit is crucial; but is not to the extent that a person has to suffer. In my opinion, a fair balance should be appropriate and desirable.

Submitted by dylan7rdgz on Sun Nov 20 2022

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15Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

271 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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in some cultures children are taught by their parents that they can achieve anything with hard work what are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

some people beleive that it is important to keep the home and the work place tidy and organized. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view.

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changes because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or negative development?

some people believe that everyone has a right to have access to university education and that governments should make it free for all students no matter what financial background they have. To what extent do you agree or disagree ? Nhi

Some people think that the best way to broaden young people's understanding of the world is to encourage them to travel to other countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? What other measures do you think might be effective?