Is it good for children to start using computers from an early age and spend long hours on it? Discuss the advantages and disadvantages. Explain your choice by using specific reasons and details.
Nowadays,
children
learning to use computers
when they are very young. They are consuming many hours on those devices during the day. By spending time on the computer
, they missing out other experience that also
is important for them to grow up and be ready for the big world. In this
essay I will explane the positive and the negative sides about children
and the use of a computer
.
On the one hand, in the modern world all the households having their own computer
. On the young age toddlers see their parents sitting behind their computer
and maybe using it for work or buying products online. Then
they are going to school, and currently, all schools having computers
in their classroom. With computers
everywhere, it is important for children
to be educated how to use a computer
. For example
: essays are made on the computer
and not by handwriting anymore therefore
they need typing skills using the internet for research.
On the other hand
, sitting behind the computer
for many hours it not healthy for children
. They also
need to learn to communicate with others in real life. For example
: children
need to learn to interact with peers in the classroom, making friends on the playground. That are other essentail qualities what they need to learn and is not possible from behind a computer
. By missing out those skills they become less socialize people when they are growing up as adults.
In conclusion, I believe that children
need to skills to work with computers
but, the long hours behind the computer
having, also
negative impact on social behavoir of young people and therefore
not necessary.Submitted by annemariebloemberg on
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task response
Develop a clearer thesis statement that addresses the advantages and disadvantages of children using computers from an early age. Ensure that each paragraph supports the main points of the essay.
coherence and cohesion
The essay lacks clear organization and coherence. Ensure that the introduction clearly outlines the main points to be discussed, and that the body paragraphs are structured in a logical manner with clear topic sentences and transitions between ideas.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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