IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

The best way to solve the world’s environmental problem is to increase the price of fuel. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#world’s #price #fuel
There is a controversial perception heating up a debate over whether a hike applied in petroleum’s
price
 plays an optimal role in addressing the cross-bordered pollution. In my opinion, I would not consider myself an advocate of
this
 perspective. Without a shadow
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
 a doubt that increasing the
price
 of fuel is not an ideal tactic to solve
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
environmental degradation. To be more precise, in elastic demand for oil, a wide range of vehicles run on gas so
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
despite the acceleration in the cost of fuel,
such
 needs
are risen
Change to the active voice
rise
have risen
show examples
 exponentially on
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 frequent basis. Viet Nam can be named as an outstanding instance,
although
 the state relentlessly rose the
gas’s
Change noun form
gas
show examples
price
, there are huge throngs waiting in a long
queue
Fix the agreement mistake
queues
show examples
 regularly to purchase gas on the ground
that
Correct word choice
and
show examples
 commuting is
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 indispensable demand in humans’ daily life.
As a result
,
such
approach
Correct article usage
an approach
show examples
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
 no difference in declining the number of modes in use.
Thus
,
fuel’s
Change noun form
fuel
show examples
price
 fluctuation
do
Change the verb form
does
show examples
 not serve as an effective resolution for protecting the habitat quality. While
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 ineffective impact of the climb in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fuel’s
Change noun form
fuel
show examples
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
 is widely acknowledged, there is a wealth of more far-reaching alternatives to handle environmental issues
such
 as popularizing hybrid vehicles to the public. To be specific,
this
 transport is mainly activated by
electric
Replace the word
electricity
show examples
 which is generated from renewable
source
Fix the agreement mistake
sources
show examples
sent
Wrong verb form
sending
show examples
 out zero greenhouse gas.
For example
, Vinfast, a nationally well-known car
make
Replace the word
maker
show examples
 in Viet Nam,
possessing
Wrong verb form
possesses
show examples
 an eco-friendly vehicle system not only fulfils the popular’s arrival need but
also
 brings healthy air quality.
Therefore
, applying electric modes is one of the most possible methods to reduce the large amount of carbon footprint which poses a great threat to the ecosystem. To sum up, it is better for the authority to search for other effective remedies like
Correct your spelling
utilizing
ultilizing
Correct your spelling
utilising
 hybrid transports to tackle the alarming environmental problems in lieu of constantly surging the
price
 of petroleum.
Submitted by hominhtrang995 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • fuel consumption
  • renewable energy
  • emissions
  • electric vehicles
  • low-income families
  • commute
  • fuel-efficient technologies
  • public transport infrastructure
  • global disparity
  • developing nations
  • alternative energy sources
  • sustainable practices
  • economic impact
  • conservation efforts
  • environmental sustainability
What to do next:
Look at other essays: