IN SOME COUNTRIES MORE AND MORE ADULTS ARE CONTINUING TO LIVE WITH PARENTS EVEN AFTER COMPLETING THEIR EDUCATION AND GETTING JOBS. DO THE ADVANTAGES OUTWIEGH DISADVANTAGES

this

Linking Words

day and age, the vast majority of elders are still dwelling with their

parents

Use synonyms

ignoring the factors of completing education and receiving occupation. Personally, I consider that the drawbacks of

this

Linking Words

issue is outperforms the advantages. In the forthcoming ,paragraph

this

Linking Words

essay is going to discuss its reasons with relevant examples.

First

Linking Words

of all, the main drawback of the current issue is depriving independent an individual.

In other words

Linking Words

, the grown-up individual could not learn the ropes of self-sufficiency

such

Linking Words

as housework, cooking skills, laundry and etc.

Consequently

Linking Words

, they mature slowly but surely becoming a child

instead

Linking Words

of maturing as independent people. A bright future pinned with

Correct article usage

show examples

well-paid

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

show examples

and possessions would not be achieved by an adult since he will not gain useful experience gained because of obstacles faced in independent life.

For example

Linking Words

, the recent news from BBC clearly depicted the countries of mature living with their guardian. Precisely, Kazakhstan showed the highest result of both not freedom and poor grown individuals.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, the vast majority of the elderly could be vulnerable to complicated obstacles occurred in life. To be more precise, in most cases many problems faced by mature dwelling with their

parents

Use synonyms

are usually tackled by their

parents

Use synonyms

Consequently

Linking Words

, they are not gaining any paramount experience that could be used in tackling issues and making

a proper decisions

Correct the article-noun agreement

a proper decision

proper decisions

show examples

That is

Linking Words

why the drawback entirely outdoes the pros. In conclusion, due to depriving independence and not gaining experience in solving problems the disadvantages of dwelling with

parents

Use synonyms

the disadvantages completely outweigh the advantages.

argyn-34

Dec 7, 2022

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

258 words

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IN SOME COUNTRIES MORE AND MORE ADULTS ARE CONTINUING TO LIVE WITH PARENTS EVEN AFTER COMPLETING THEIR EDUCATION AND GETTING JOBS. DO THE ADVANTAGES OUTWIEGH DISADVANTAGES

A lot of people who wanted to become professional athlete gave up this idea because of the fear of failure and parents’ pressure. Do you think that parents should support their children who want to do a career in sports?

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

These days mobile phones and the internet are very important to the ways in which people relate to one another socially. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Every year several languages die out. Some people think this is not important because life will be easier if there are fewer languages in the world. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In modern times, children are spending less time with their families and more time with their friends. 1. Why has this change occurred? 2. Should parents force their children to spend more time at home?