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Band 4

Some people think that men and women have good expertise only in particular fields. This means men are better at doing certain jobs and women are better at doing some other jobs. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #men #women #expertise #fields #jobs
In
Modern
Correct article usage
the Modern
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 era, equality became
trends
Fix the agreement mistake
trend
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 in the global world. Education play
vital
Correct article usage
a vital
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 role in
women
's
life
Replace the word
lives
show examples
 and
women
 contributed effectively in many sectors as
man
Add an article
a man
show examples
.
However
, still some people harbour a belief that
men
 and
women
 have good expertise only in some streams according to physical body
strenght
Correct your spelling
strength
 and brain skills. From my
prespective
Correct your spelling
perspective
, I tend to stand with the former statement.
This
eassy
Correct your spelling
essay
easy
 will elaborate
the
Change preposition
on the
show examples
postivie
Correct your spelling
positive
apects
Correct your spelling
aspects
 of
this
Correct determiner usage
these
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 trends and
thus
 lead to a logical conclusion. There are
plenthora
Correct your spelling
plethora
 of reasons to agree with the meritorious side.
The
Correct article usage
apply
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First
 and Foremost
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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women
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 not capable as man regards
to
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of
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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physical strength. To probe more deeply, in the firefighter stream,
fighers
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fighters
 need to go inside
in
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apply
show examples
the building and control the fire.
For
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This
show examples
this
 position, required more strength to carry the
equipments
Change the wording
equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
show examples
 and guts.Another observation in
this
regards
Fix the agreement mistake
regard
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 is that
basically
Add a comma
,basically
show examples
women
 are more skilled than
men
, there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 good expertise to present
and
Correct your spelling
an
show examples
 analysis of the views and provide effective feedback.
Secondly
,
Men
 as the Father cannot be replaced by the
mother's
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mother
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 position. There's no doubt that parents play a vital role in children's
life
Replace the word
lives
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, but
mother
Correct article usage
the mother
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 breed milk
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the baby and
this
 role cannot
matched
Change the verb form
be matched
show examples
 by the father.
Furthermore
,
Category
Correct article usage
the Category
show examples
 of
men
 and
women
 contributed fully in the particular stream where they are very good at it. Needless to
says
Wrong verb form
say
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, all the point stands in the good stem. To sum up, all aforementioned above
as
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
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clear
evident
Replace the word
evidence
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 that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
men
 and
women
 have good expertise only
in particular
 fields.
However
, both gender
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
 to equally with respect and love.
Consequently
, I firmly agree
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
 the given statement.
Submitted by dhivyaravi0396 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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