Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different culture and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #music #culture #ages

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There is no doubt about the fact that

music

Use synonyms

is a crucial part of

individual's

Correct article usage

an individual's

show examples

life .

However

Linking Words

, there are some who opine that

music

Use synonyms

is the best way to bring masses of different customs and ages together. In a subsequent , paragraph I intended to shed light on the given topic with proper illustrations and an appropriate conclusion. Analysing the statement and explaining

further

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, the

first

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and foremost reason is that flok can meet one another in concerts . By

Linking Words

this

Add a comma

,this

show examples

I mean that if a famous singer arranges

live

Correct article usage

a live

show examples

show

Linking Words

particular

Correct article usage

a particular

show examples

era

then

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people

Use synonyms

of different

culture

Fix the agreement mistake

cultures

show examples

and age

group

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groups

show examples

will come to

see

Correct pronoun usage

themsee

himsee

hersee

show examples

, so it gives

chance

Correct article usage

the chance

show examples

public

Add an article

the public

show examples

to talk and make friends .

For example

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the

Correct word choice

if the

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popular

indian

Change the capitalization

Indian

show examples

singer

arijit

Change the capitalization

Arijit

show examples

singh

Change the capitalization

Singh

show examples

performs in concert

then

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many

people

Use synonyms

from

Correct article usage

the muslim

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muslim

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Muslim

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and

hindu

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Hindu

show examples

religion

Fix the agreement mistake

religions

show examples

will visit it.

Secondly

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, communication with each other would make good bonds between them .

In addition

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this

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, folk can share their opinions on lyrics as well as talk about their favourite songs .

Furthermore

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this

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gives an opportunity to

public

Correct article usage

the public

show examples

for being united.

On the other hand

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, some

people

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prefer to

listen

Add the preposition

tolisten

show examples

songs

not

Add the comma(s)

,not

show examples

by their meaning , so

this

Linking Words

proves that they like melody .

Moreover

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, there are many

music

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albums in various languages , which flok do not prefer because they want to

listen

Add the preposition

tolisten

show examples

the

music

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of their own language.

For instance

Linking Words

, if a foreign single sing a song

then

Linking Words

who

Correct pronoun usage

those who

show examples

not understands

english

Change the capitalization

English

show examples

will avoid

to listen

Change the verb form

listening

show examples

Conclusion

Change preposition

In conclusion

show examples

, I indeed think that

music

Use synonyms

can bring the public of many customs and ages together because

the

Correct article usage

show examples

number of

people

Use synonyms

love

Change the verb form

loves

show examples

listen

Add the preposition

tolisten

show examples

it.

Submitted by pyash5245 on Wed Dec 21 2022

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

286 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

cultural diversity
harmony
integration
bridging gaps
foster
ignite
embrace
communicate
celebrate
appreciate
inclusivity
universal language
emotional resonance
shared experiences
intercultural dialogue
intergenerational connections
cultural exchange
catalyst

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Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different culture and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

Many people choose to travel abroad to learn a foreign language instead of studying in their home town. Do the advantages of learning a new language in this way outweigh the disadvantages?

Private car ownership has been increasing over the past few decades. This has given ordinary people greater mobility, but has also led to concerns about traffic congestion and air pollution. Do the advantages of private car ownership outweigh the disadvantages?

Space travel has been possible for some time and some people believe that space tourism could be developed in the future. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Both government investment in public transport systems and reductions in public transport ticket prices will help to reduce transport pollution greatly. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?