UNEMPLOYMENT IS ONE OF THE BIGGEST PROBLEMS OF CONTEMPORARY SOCIETY. WHAT DO YOU THINK ARE THE MAIN CAUSES OF UNEMPLOYMENT? WHAT SOLUTIONS CAN YOU SUGGEST?

#unemployment #society

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this

modern era,

employments

Change the noun form

employment

show examples

rates are increased compared to the past.

However

, in some non-developed

countries

Add a comma

,countries

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unemployment

is one of the major issues rather than others.

However

, I personally believe that employment

is totally depends

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totally depends

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on a person’s skill and knowledge. In

this

essay

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,essay

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I will give what are the causes of

unemployment

and suggest some solutions related to

this

problem. There are many reasons behind

unemployment

The

Correct article usage

First

show examples

first

and foremost

Unnecessary verb

apply

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the government does not pass

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

vacancies for uneducated society.

Secondly

, globalisation is

the

Change the article

apply

show examples

one of the biggest problems behind the decreased rate

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show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

unemployment

Thirdly

educated

Add an article

the educated

an educated

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community cannot satisfy

from

Change preposition

with

show examples

their working life and low salaries affect

professional’s

Correct article usage

a professional’s

show examples

mindset

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

from

this

Add a comma

,this

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they cannot find a specific company,

who

Correct pronoun usage

that

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paid more according to

skills

Correct article usage

the skills

show examples

that they have.

On the other hand

, there

some

Add a missing verb

are some

show examples

solutions to solve

this

problem.

Firstly

, the government have to conduct a survey on joblessness and

then

give notices through the use of newspaper and advertisements. To illustrate

this

, recently Reliance group and TATA group passed the short notice for labours to work in their huge industries.

Lastly

, these types of industries can easily give

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

jobs

to non-educated society and from

this

job sicker will have

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

jobs

and earn

Remove the article

apply

show examples

money. Agglomerating all points above elaborated, I opine that there are lots of skills and courses whose will definitely increase the employment rates.

However

, somewhere the government would have to pass the open

jobs

and vacancies, where illiterate people easily get

jobs

and fulfil their basic needs from

the

Change the word

their

show examples

earnings.

Submitted by rahulgpatel19 on Fri Dec 23 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

260 words

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UNEMPLOYMENT IS ONE OF THE BIGGEST PROBLEMS OF CONTEMPORARY SOCIETY. WHAT DO YOU THINK ARE THE MAIN CAUSES OF UNEMPLOYMENT? WHAT SOLUTIONS CAN YOU SUGGEST?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Every year large numbers of people migrate from one country to another for different reasons. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of migration for the individual and for society as a whole.

Some people say that television is useful for education, while others say it is more useful for entertainment. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

The only way to improve road safety is to have stricter punishments for driving offenders.

Describe current technology used in schools. What technology is most important in the classroom? Explain with details and examples.

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.