Some people think news has no connection to people's lives so then it is a waste of time to read news paper and watch television news programs To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In the present day, with the advance of urbanization and technology resulting in a fast-paced world, a plethora of
people
tend to
belive
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
that visual
entertaintment
Correct your spelling
entertainment
has no more interlinked with
peers
Change noun form
peers'
peer's
show examples
lifestyle
Fix the agreement mistake
lifestyles
show examples
and is becoming useless. I strongly agree that these developments will
result
Add the preposition
inresult
fromresult
show examples
more negative impacts than
positive
Correct pronoun usage
onespositive
show examples
.
First
and foremost, having
a
Change the article
an
show examples
eye on
news
Add an article
the news
show examples
has always been numerous benefits over the
last
two decades.
This
gives a medium to all kinds of
people
a proper form of information about
day to day
Add a hyphen
day-to-day
show examples
knowledge and it keeps them up to
dated
Change the form of the verb
date
show examples
.
In addition
to
this
,
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
show examples
follow
news
Correct article usage
the news
show examples
in every section
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
have always
a strong opinions
Correct the article-noun agreement
strong opinions
a strong opinion
show examples
about the world.
For instance
, a
person
who
read
Change the verb form
reads
show examples
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
will always
Add a missing verb
be a
show examples
a
Change the article
an
show examples
intelligent
person
even if he is not very wealthy.
Nevertheless
,
people
nowadays are so busy
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
making their
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
show examples
. They hardly have time to watch a movie to get some
entertaintment
Correct your spelling
entertainment
.
Futhermore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
,
this
modern content is no more
knowledgable
Correct your spelling
knowledgeable
show examples
and
this
makes no glitter for the
career oriented
Add a hyphen
career-oriented
show examples
person
.
For example
, a writer will always get inspired by true stories and by nature,
this
flashy media will not provide them
Add the preposition
with a
show examples
a fascinating ideas
Correct the article-noun agreement
a fascinating idea
fascinating ideas
show examples
to get
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
what he is looking for. The other significant reason for supporting my view is that they
appered
Correct your spelling
appear
as a robot in
this
contemporary world means that they do not have adequate awareness that what is going around them. It makes them less interactive
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
in
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
gathering
Fix the agreement mistake
gatherings
show examples
. To illustrate, in
art
Add an article
an art
show examples
gallery full of talented
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
that robotic
person
may not survive and it
suffocate
Change the verb form
suffocates
show examples
.
This
could result in a decline in
people
's basic
ability
Fix the agreement mistake
abilities
show examples
. To conclude, it is not a healthy sign to cut off from the environment by reading a blog or watching a piece of information. In the
future
Add a comma
,future
show examples
this
will need to be addressed if we are to avoid damaging impacts on
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
show examples
and society.
Submitted by wardahsaeedk on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: