IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Many People believe that social networking websites (such as facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both individual and society. To what extent do you agree?

#people #websites #facebook #impact #society
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
A
lot
 of
individuals
 withhold a perspective that social networking
websites
 (namely Facebook) have negatively affected the individual as well as society to a great extent. In my opinion,
although
, social media
websites
 have negatively affected
individuals
 and societies,
however
, it has
also
 connected the
world
 and provided a new and better market for
individuals
 which leads towards a better economy.
Firstly
, undoubtedly social networking
websites
 have had a negative effect on
individuals
 and society,
such
 as
time
 wastage.
Individuals
 can waste a
lot
 of
time
 on social networking
websites
 because it is highly addictive due to the availability of a
lot
 of unnecessary content on it. Wasting
time
 on these platforms can lead towards a sedentary lifestyle and unproductiveness, causing deterioration of physical and mental health, namely obesity and depression.
However
, these social networking
websites
 have a positive side to them as well,
such
 as connecting the
world
. In today's ,era an individual can easily connect, chat and have knowledge about their loved one's life by using them. They can make new friends as well who can be from around the
world
,
hence
 increasing their overall knowledge and empathy for communities of diverse races, religions and nationalities.
Finally
, these social networking
websites
 have created a new marketplace where the whole
world
 can be a potential customer and less investment is needed. Not only it is a blessing for all the sellers, but
also
 a door for
individuals
 with less initial capital, as a physical shop with a
lot
 of inventory is not required to start a business.
Moreover
 in covid when unemployment was at its peak, these platforms helped people earn money and
hence
 helped the economy grow. In conclusion,
Although
 social networking
websites
 have a huge negative effect on
individuals
 and societies by wasting their precious
time
 ,
however
, it can be used to connect people around the
world
 and create a much better marketplace which will help
individuals
 and societies grow.
Submitted by sabahmajeed10.sm on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: