IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we are no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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In our up-to-date life , advertising plays an important role in our daily lives. Others believe that advertising is so pervasive that we ignore it. I believe that advertising still plays a large role in our decisions, and I will discuss both points of view in
this
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 essay. On the one hand, we already live in the digital age, where advertisements are easily accessible.
Linking Words
This days
Change the determiner
This day
These days
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 because
people
Use synonyms
 spend more time surfing the Internet, they may have more time to see
such
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 advertisements to buy products.
For example
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, there are some communities that are popular on social media.
Thats
Correct your spelling
That's
That
That is
 why, we can expect them to be very effective. If there are too many advertisements, they will have a negative effect and annoy the customers.
Therefore
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, the majority of citizens will not pay attention to it and the presence of advertising.
On the other hand
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, advertising will help to increase the sales of goods. It attracts and increases
people
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's desire to achieve something.
For example
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, an ad for a massage chair provides ease of use while helping
people
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 to relieve the stress needed for the stressful work life of today's society. So, advertising plays a good role in persuading
people
Use synonyms
 to buy, which can change the public's attitude towards the product. In conclusion, it can be seen that there are pros and cons to advertising. In my opinion, many types of advertising can still be important,
this
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 can be a reason for companies to still trust and invest in them
,
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apply
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 because the strengths of the subject outweigh the disadvantages.

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • persuade
  • promote
  • attract
  • influence
  • impact
  • consumerism
  • commercialism
  • market
  • product
  • brand
  • endorsement
  • manipulative
  • saturated
  • overwhelmed
  • repetitive
  • distracting
  • irrelevant
  • exaggerated
  • misleading
  • desensitized
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