Technology have changed the way children spend their free time. Do the advantages of this outweigh disadvantages?

#technology #children #time #outweigh

Following the rapid development of new

technology

, the way

children

spend their spare time has been altered.

This

topic contains advantages and drawbacks.

This

essay will conflict

both

Change preposition

with both

show examples

views given. On the one hand, in terms of the negative side, internet addiction may lead to illness and a passive lifestyle. It is proven that keeping eyes on screens and consoles for a long period of time may put you at risk of poor vision, and headaches.

Secondly

technology

may change

children

's lifestyles to having no movement and just sitting.

For instance

children

with

technology

addiction have fewer outdoor activities, which leads to laziness.

On the other hand

, spending time on the internet includes some benefits, two of which will be explained.

Firstly

, advanced

technology

offers us the chance to communicate with people from all around the world, and to have easy access to all types of information, which can make

children

more brilliant.

For instance

instead

of reading from historical books, they can step into virtual reality and experience historical events.

Also

children

can now have access to online information on various subjects and interact with the subject’s experts for

further

professional knowledge. In conclusion, despite

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the cons, with

technology

children

have been given the chance to boost the quality of their life. I strongly believe that the advantages are more significant than the disadvantages.

Submitted by nasrrohina on Sat Jan 21 2023

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

223 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Technology have changed the way children spend their free time. Do the advantages of this outweigh disadvantages?

Word Count

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