Nowadays, some people believe that fashion is very important for youngsters and it has negative impact on the people and society. Do you agree or disagree with statement?

21st
Correct article usage
The 21st
show examples
century can be regarded as the
fashion oriented
Add a hyphen
fashion-oriented
show examples
era. Major trends in the field of clothing, beauty products and
hair dressing
Correct your spelling
hairdressing
show examples
can be seen in
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
few decades.
According to
some
people
's opinion,
fashion
has become inevitable for the youth but at the same
time
Add a comma
,time
show examples
it has a devastating effect on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social and cultural life. I tend to disagree with the statement and would like to elaborate
my
Change preposition
on my
show examples
point of view on the same. To commence with,
due to
advancement
Fix the agreement mistake
advancements
show examples
in the field of technology,
present day
Add a hyphen
present-day
show examples
clothing has seen a successful shift as compared to the
last
few decades
where
Correct word choice
when
show examples
people
used not to have so many options available. In today's world, it has become important for the younger generation to keep up with the ongoing
fashoin
Correct your spelling
fashion
trends.
Secondly
, in the old times,
due to
limited choices,
people
did not have so many options to style
themseles
Correct your spelling
themselves
.
Nowdays
Correct the word
Nowadays
show examples
,
fashion
Add an article
the fashion
show examples
industry has become more independent in terms of styling taste and
masses
Correct article usage
the masses
show examples
have a plethora of things to pick from. Economically,
fashion
industries and brands have seen huge profits over the years and
rooted
Add a missing verb
are rooted
show examples
as one of the most successful
institution
Change to a plural noun
institutions
show examples
. Talking about the impact of
fashion
on society and culture, I think
fashion
has not any adverse effects on
socio-cultural
Correct article usage
the socio-cultural
show examples
life of
people
. Today, any cultural and social clothes are available in any craft and design.
People
can dress and make themselves up perfectly the way they want to be.
Moreover
, with the inauguration of
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of fashionable industries, any kind of clothing, hair styling,
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
beauty products etcetera are available at desired prices.
In addition
to
this
,
People
can invent, sell and
deliever
Correct your spelling
deliver
clothes online which gives rise to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
employment and business
oppertunities
Correct your spelling
opportunities
for society.
To sum
up
Add a comma
,up
show examples
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
, I would like to say that the
fashion
industry is one of the major economical and social
outbreak
Fix the agreement mistake
outbreaks
show examples
of
this
century and
having
Change the form of the verb
has
show examples
a great and glorious impact on social and cultural life in terms of economy, variety and employment.
Submitted by amarvir66 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: