Young people who commit crimes should be treated the same as adults by the authorities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

this

current world, youth who make crimes should be dealt with the same as a person. I disagree with that statement, and

this

essay will elaborate

further

To begin

with, there are two reasons why I disagree with the cited issue. First of all, young people relatively have no knowledge of how their actions violate the rule of law or not.

This

is probably because they have been not educated about the law or ethics in life by their parents.

In addition

, the intellectual maturity of youngsters is not fully mature. Since many young people especially pubertal youth are in the phase of reproductive maturation, so they want to impress the opposite gender.

As a result

, they tend to use all means to fulfil the ego in attracting the opposite sex.

Moreover

, to support my argument there are two adverse effects of punishing juveniles equal to persons. The most impactful factor is the potential for adults to exert more influence over the crimes committed by teenagers.

Furthermore

, the punishment that youth receive does nothing to deter them but rather increases their ability to make offences. Another possible effect is the psychological health of those who receive

such

punishment. Not all of them might be depressed or mentally disordered.

However

, the level of stress caused is extremely vulnerable

as well as

contributes to the advancement of the nation's generation. Taking everything into consideration. I strongly disagree with the provision of the same penalty between youngsters and adults. On the one hand, teenagers generally are still needful of education regarding criminal activity

as well as

the desire-based decision-making propensity.

Besides

that, the effects of these policies tend to leave them worse off.

Submitted by misstiasclassroom on Tue Feb 21 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

281 words

7.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Young people who commit crimes should be treated the same as adults by the authorities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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