We live today in an electronic information age. It is easier to be connected by technology yet many people seem to no closer to feeling happy in their lives. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#information #age #technology #people #lives

In today's world,

technology

has made it easier for people to stay connected to others.

However

, despite

this

, many individuals still find it difficult to feel happy in their lives. I agree that we are living in an electronic information age, but I believe that

happiness

is not solely dependent on

technology

To begin

with,

technology

has its advantages in terms of communication and access to information. It has helped people to connect with others from different parts of the world, and it has made the world a smaller place.

In addition

, it has made it easier for people to access information and learn new things.

However

, it is important to note that

happiness

is not solely dependent on these factors.

Furthermore

happiness

is a subjective term

that is

different for every individual. It cannot be measured by the amount of

technology

that one has access to.

Happiness

comes from within and is dependent on various factors

such

as personal relationships, self-esteem, and personal goals.

Technology

may provide a temporary sense of

happiness

, but it cannot replace the importance of human connection and personal

fulfillment

Change the spelling

fulfilment

show examples

. In conclusion,

while

technology

has made our lives easier and more connected, it is not the sole factor in determining

happiness

Happiness

comes from within and is dependent on various factors.

Therefore

, it is important to focus on personal relationships, self-esteem, and personal goals to achieve true

happiness

. We should strive to find a balance between the benefits of

technology

and the importance of human connection and personal

fulfillment

Change the spelling

fulfilment

show examples

Submitted by Deadline 8th April IELTS on Sat Mar 04 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph is logically connected to the previous one, and that there is a clear progression of ideas throughout the essay.

task response

Make sure to address all parts of the essay question in a clear and comprehensive manner. Use relevant specific examples to support your points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

254 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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We live today in an electronic information age. It is easier to be connected by technology yet many people seem to no closer to feeling happy in their lives. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

Many people think that countries have a moral obligation to help each other, while others argue that aid money is misspent by the governments that receive it and therefore international aid should not be given to poor countries. Discuss these two points of view and give your opinion.

Everyone should stay in school until the age of eighteen , considering the significance of primary & secondary level education in a learner's life. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

Fewer students are studying science at school and university, favouring more computer based subjects instead. Is this a positive or negative development? What are the reasons for this?

People have to spend more and more time travelling from their homes for jobs and study. What are the reasons? How can we solve this problem?