Obesity is a serious problem in many countries, especially in reach countries. Discuss ways to solve the problem . Provide specific reason and examples to support your answer.
Nowadays, many rich nations are struggling with obesity as a major health challenge. The reasons for the existence of
this
problem can be tied to the busy nature of citizens that requires folk to eat a lot of junk foods, as well as
the lack of awareness of the ripple effect of their actions. To solve these issues, the government should enforce a 4-day working day per week and create enough sensitization on the importance of eating healthy meals.
Firstly
, a major contributor to this
issue is the lack of time
available for the population to make out
Change preposition
apply
time
to whip up a meal. For example
, recent surveys show that overpopulation in China has increased the traffic situation in the country. Hence
, people
tend to get tired when they get home and are unable to prepare a good meal after munching on junk all day. One way to curb this
behaviour is the introduction of a reduced number
of working days in a week thus
giving citizens enough time
to stock their fridges with fresh food in readiness for the coming days.
Secondly
, the level of negligence regarding the consequences of a large number
of countrymen on unhealthy living has also
led to a high number
of obese people
. For instance
, ABC news
reported that Venezuela has a relatively large Capitalize word
News
number
of people
suffering from obesity because there isn't enough education about obesity. A solution to this
issue will be the creation of recreational centres and encouraging citizens to engage in exercise by educating them about its benefits.
To sum up
, people
who have enough time
to themselves will live a healthy life. Moreover
, the government should conduct some awareness programs about exercises and the beneficial outcomes.Submitted by olola on
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coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, but they can be strengthened by providing a clearer thesis statement and summarizing the main points more explicitly.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph directly connects to the main topic and supports the argument presented. Ensure a balanced approach in discussing the ideas and providing examples.
task achievement
The essay effectively responds to the task by discussing reasons for obesity and proposing solutions. However, provide more depth in explaining the ripple effect and the importance of healthy eating. Make sure to address all parts of the prompt.
task achievement
The essay effectively explores the reasons for obesity and provides specific examples to support the proposed solutions.
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