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Band 6

Some people think learning painting and drawing at school is a waste of time while others think it is important. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.

#people #school #waste #time #points
It has been argued by many individuals that studying creativities
such
 as painting and drawing at institutes is an unnecessary subject,
whereas
 opponents reckon that it is essential. I favour the latter perspective;
however
,
this
 essay shall dwell on both viewpoints in the subsequent paragraphs
along with
 a reasoned conclusion. On the one side, the fundamental benefit of learning art in schools. Students might showcase their hidden talent
front
Change preposition
in front
show examples
 of the public. In the past
time
, people
have
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 more natural power, whilst they do not illustrate among the citizens as
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their schools, do not have
Add an article
a course
the course
show examples
course
Fix the agreement mistake
courses
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 that types of activities,
while
 in
this
 contemporary era, educational institutes took compulsory subjects of drawing, painting and singing which may become
friutful
Correct your spelling
fruitful
 for their upcoming
time
.
For instance
, a survey conducted by Harward University revealed that 65% of human beings earned name and fame by performing the talent because mentors have been teaching related to
this
 topic.
On the other hand
, the prominent drawback of grasping information regarding
extra
Add an article
the extra
show examples
 curriculum. Teachers need to teach those subjects which are related to the academic field. If they focus on only education, they could become
successful
Add an article
the successful
show examples
 person their
further
 life
as well as
 get white-collar jobs and huge amounts of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
capital with the assistance of
this
 they may
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
show examples
 their basic needs and family.
For example
, it is published an article by The Tribune newspaper showed that more than 200 hundred schools in India do not organize competitions of art because they believed that it is a
wasting
Replace the word
waste
show examples
 of
time
 for learners.
Due to
this
, I favour the same.
To conclude
,
although
 spending their precious
time
 period on drawing and painting at their school age is useful, it puts
an adverse effects
Correct the article-noun agreement
an adverse effect
adverse effects
show examples
 on their study.
Submitted by deepikanayyar1996 on

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • self-expression
  • creativity
  • problem-solving
  • critical thinking
  • cultural literacy
  • historical awareness
  • therapeutic
  • career relevance
  • design principles
  • STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Mathematics)
  • non-essential
  • resource allocation
  • standardized testing
  • practical use
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