Some people think that personal happiness is directly related to economic success. Others argue that happiness depends on different factors. Discuss both views and give your opinion

People

claim that money doesn’t bring happiness, but

this

gives a high degree of freedom in choices and improves the quality of

life

While

others

believe that moments of joy can just pass by meaninglessly when there is no one close nearby whom they can be shared with. It is often claimed that economic success opens a wide range of opportunities once it has been reached.

This

has happened by virtue of covering all the basic needs of daily

life

, namely, food, medical care and living conditions.

As a result

, it allows focusing on more personal goals for the sake of self-fulfilment

according to

the Maslow pyramid. Eventually, a new palette of emotions and experience become open which most

people

are striving for in order to live a full

life

By contrast

, some

people

argue that personal happiness reveals only in truly accepting the achievements of someone by

others

.It is obvious that

people

are social beings by their nature in most

life

aspects, so having great surrounding and maintaining good relationships with family and friends allow them to benefit from psychological health at first.

Thus

, it helps to maintain a positive attitude toward

life

in general

as well as

a critical one as they should be in balance in order to be able to enjoy these moments.

However

, it’s really hard to keep the balance all the time considering the disastrous pace of

life

nowadays. It’s commonly claimed by psychologists that doing what a person delights the most helps bring internal satisfaction and mental calmness.

As a result

, it allows planning the future

life

which helps to keep the course of actions during the lifetime.

However

, most

people

who have reached economic success are burdened with great responsibility with respect to

others

This

burden could take away most benefits of a wealthy

life

due to

the mental pressure first of all.

This

is where close surroundings could help by lending a shoulder in times of struggle. In conclusion, it is important to keep the balance between reaching personal goals and giving out to

others

as much as possible. It is true to say that economic success plays a key role in personal happiness, but it’s not limited by

this

People

are recognized by

others

for their merits, so communicating with close surrounding sometimes produce a stronger effect on enjoyment than personal achievements.

Submitted by mxyakovenko9 on Sun Mar 26 2023

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

392 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that personal happiness is directly related to economic success. Others argue that happiness depends on different factors. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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