IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

There are severe social consequences to housing shortages and only the government can solve these problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#consequences #shortages #government
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Being homeless can cause lots of disasters, including social repercussions. It is believed that
government
Use synonyms
 is the only institution
that is
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 responsible to solve
such
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 a problem. I approximately disagree with
this
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 opinion as the
government
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 face much more critical matters, and other groups should participate in these fields.
Firstly
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, the
government
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 has a limited budget source.
While
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 each
government
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 has its own methods to make
money
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such
Linking Words
 as taxes, and
this
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 income should be spent on the
people
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, there are so many areas that need
money
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.
For example
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, some rare diseases require specific interventions, especially in the terms of treatment,
therefore
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 no
money
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 would be left to assign for housing issues.
Secondly
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, some organizations which are independent of the
government
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 are presented in some countries. These institutes work for the
people
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 of their country, and they provide houses specifically for homeless individuals. They make
money
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 from different methods like collecting
money
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 from affluent community groups who like to help homeless
people
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.
Moreover
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, global organizations have
participation
Replace the word
participated
show examples
 in some critical matters like
this
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 issue.
However
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, each
government
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 is in charge of supplying basic needs, and if a country suffers from a high level of homeless individuals, the
government
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 is condemned. As convincing as
this
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 point
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
this
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, the
government
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 has a restricted budget, and many complications need budget allocation.
In addition
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, organizations with an aim of helping
people
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 can solve
this
Linking Words
 problem. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 being homeless is attributed to many problems, the
government
Use synonyms
 cannot manage
this
Linking Words
 complication alone. Everybody should help out in order to provide essential houses. As
this
Linking Words
 essay has shown, required actions should be undertaken at the global level.
Submitted by sheida95jahanbekam on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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