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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The pie chart gives information on UAE government spending in 2000. The total budget was AED 315 billion. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The pie chart gives information on UAE government spending in 2000. The total budget was AED 315 billion. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #uae #government #budget #billion #features #comparisons
The
presents
Change the noun form
present
show examples
 bar chart illustrates information about the
expenditure
 of the
government's
Change noun form
government
show examples
 in UAE. The total amount of
budgets
Fix the agreement mistake
budget
show examples
 is 315
billion
. From an
overall
 perspective, it's
clearly
Replace the word
clear
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 that, there is have 10 sectors, and
many
Correct your spelling
any
show examples
portion
Change to a plural noun
portions
show examples
 of the pie chart's spending money
expenditure
 shows
excessive
Correct article usage
an excessive
show examples
amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
show examples
.
To begin
 with,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social security, health and personal social services, education, and
defense
Change the spelling
defence
show examples
expenditure
 a significantly different from others. And they
are demonstrate
Change the verb form
demonstrate
show examples
 respectively 100, 53, 38, and 22 AED
billion
.
In addition
, every part of the money goes
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 distinguishing segments of the country.
On the other hand
,
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 six
part
Fix the agreement mistake
parts
show examples
 of the chart divides into
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
small portions.
Firstly
, the housing and
environments
Fix the agreement mistake
environment
show examples
spends
Change the verb form
spend
show examples
 AED 15
billion
, debt interest and other
expenditure
illustrates
Change the verb form
illustrate
show examples
 us same measures 23
billion
. Law and order AED 7
billion
 and industry,
agriculture
Correct word choice
and agriculture
show examples
 shows respectively less
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
billion
 than love and order.
Eventually
Add a comma
,Eventually
show examples
 most law trend
is transport
Change the verb form
is transported
is transporting
show examples
, and
expenditure
 is 9
billion
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words expenditure, billion with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "illustrates" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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