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Band 6

Write about the following topic: Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults.Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#topic #people #sense #competition #children #co-operate #adults
Nowadays,
due to
 the challenging educational system, contests between children are very popular and get support from most of every parent.but some people believe that children should
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
have
Add the particle
tohave
show examples
 involve more in teamwork and coordinate with each other to become
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
successful human being in the future. In
this
 ,
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
essay I will argue that working as a team is a key to success
instead
 of competing with each other,
Firstly
, the current student learning plan at primary levels is more on a competing base and teachers are always pushing
kids
 so hard to be number one in all aspects,
however
, many people believe that competition between sports is invaluable as
kids
 will learn how to overcome these challenges that they will face later stage at their life.but many people think that in the classroom they should be taught more about team play and supporting each other,
For instance
,in a survey conducted by a famous magazine, many young
kids
 hate
kids
 who are performing well in the classroom as they are very popular in the school among others.
on the other hand
,From the beginning of a child's life if they learn how to cooperate with each other it will be advantageous in their later life as they will not hesitate to ask for support when they really
need
Correct pronoun usage
itneed
show examples
, For ,example
kids
 who compete alone and do their work by self at later they became very stressful as they do not know how to get support from others. in conclusion, working as a team and supporting each other is much more useful and it creates great adults in the future
Submitted by ixionks on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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