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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some think secondary and high school students should be allowed to choose academic courses leading to university or practical courses leading to careers such as carpenters. 19.30 To what extent do you agree or disagree？

#think #school #students #courses #university #careers #carpenters #disagree？
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Some people argue that secondary and high schools should provide an opportunity for students
whether
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
to choose academic
subjects
 to continue their
further
 studies or practical courses . I, personally, beg to differ
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
. It is apparent that it can be straightforward if a student of the school has a right
what
Change preposition
to what
show examples
subjects
 to study
according to
 his/her interests and priorities. One of the advantages of
this
 studying style might be
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
effective nature.
In other words
, learners are likely to become goal-oriented, if their daily schedule consists of relevant
subjects
such
 as whether only math, physics, chemistry and biology or art, music,
physical
Correct word choice
and physical
show examples
 education.
Additionally
, with the help of organizing specialized classes, pupils can be able to considerably save their time from being spent on other
subjects
.
As a result
, they probably become masters
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 their majors in
short
Add an article
a short
show examples
 time.
However
, I believe that several benefits can come from the idea of teaching all
subjects
 in schools. First off, one of the main benefits of
this
 approach has to do with its diversity and versatility. Children are likely to face certain situations where both academic theories and practical experiences are required. Take gardeners
an
Change preposition
as an
show examples
 example, though
this
 job might be possessed through practical procedures in gardens, some extent of basic biology concepts should be needed to make the cultivating process an easy task.
Similarly
,
although
 many disciplines of the university curriculum are arguably based on theories, some scholars and academics have to be open-minded and creative in some circumstances.
Thus
, any exposure to practical
subjects
 like art and music, can obviously boost one’s creativity and broaden the horizon. In conclusion, though making pupils take part in selecting
subjects
 can bring about some benefits, In my opinion, it would be practical for schools to continue traditional teaching methods.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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