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Band 4

Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialise online than face to face . Is this a positive or negative development?

#people #socialise #face #development
Currently
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,Currently
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 as many people prefer to communicate with each other online.
Less
Correct quantifier usage
Fewer
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 and
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
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 humans are in touch live. On one hand, socialising online can be seen as a positive development. It means that all nations can connect despite
long
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the long
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distance
Fix the agreement mistake
distances
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. For the reason that humans can talk,
discuss
Correct word choice
and discuss
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about
Remove the preposition
apply
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various themes.
For instance
, I have distant relatives who live in Australia and sometimes we communicate on a video call. It is very suitable
,
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apply
show examples
 because they are not coming back soon.
On the other hand
, socialising online may lead to negative implications. Humans can be more isolated and disconnected from real life.
Moreover
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,Moreover
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 communication online may lead to
cyberattack
Fix the agreement mistake
cyberattacks
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.
For example
, there are many people who
cheating
Wrong verb form
cheat
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 children
the
Correct your spelling
they
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 can easily lure than
steal
Correct word choice
and steal
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 kids and purchase for work
to
Change preposition
in
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other country
Change the wording
another country
other countries
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.
Moreover
 exist
man
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men
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such
 as
lie
Add an article
the lie
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 that they
multimillionaire
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are multimillionaire
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 and they search
silly
Change preposition
for silly
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 victim. And
then
 they begin relationships,
man
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the man
a man
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 sends expensive gifts
also
Correct word choice
and also
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send
Correct subject-verb agreement
sends
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 money.
Some time
Replace the word
Sometime
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 later man says that he had a crisis and asks
Correct article usage
the women
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women
Fix the agreement mistake
woman
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 to send money for about
week
Correct article usage
a week
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.
Then
 he disappears and steals money from her card. To draw
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 conclusion, one can say that there are pluses and minuses of communication online. I prefer communication online though it is not safe. It can save
your
Correct pronoun usage
you
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 time and I think it
most
Add a missing verb
is most
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 important.
Submitted by ina1_95 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • social media platforms
  • online interactions
  • virtual communication
  • global community
  • interpersonal skills
  • digital divide
  • cyberspace
  • virtual presence
  • social networking
  • mental wellbeing
  • digital literacy
  • safe spaces
  • marginalized groups
  • face-to-face communication
  • socialisation
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