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Writing Samples
Band 6

Many people now have the freedom to work and live anywhere because of advances in communication technology and transportation. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages.

#people #freedom #work #advances #communication #technology #transportation #development
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Nowadays, the advancement of technology brought a lot of convenience to
people
 as they can
work
 and live at whichever
time
 and place they want to be.
This
 innovation in our communication and transportation allows an individual to manage
time
 effectively and
work
 flexibly. I would argue that the advantages it brings to a person's life outweigh the disadvantages. On one hand, modernization affects the
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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 of many individuals negatively as it has a destructive force ,especially for young adults. Even though the internet is an effective tool to bridge the gap between families staying in different locations and timelines,
however
, the misuse of its application could ruin relationships and image in the social community. Facebook Messenger and
tiktok
Correct your spelling
TikTok
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 apps,
for instance
, are often used by many cybercriminals to conduct human trafficking and prostitution because of uncontrolled and unsupervised posting, and video streaming .
Thus
, becoming the venue of online crimes and cyberbullying. In spite of the negative effects, it cannot be denied that there are many positive contributions brought by
this
 development.
People
 can
work
 anywhere and anytime and are openly available to their families and friends at their own convenience because of the internet and innovative transport.
Firstly
, it allows
people
 to connect and reconnect with their distant loved ones, relatives or friends.
Secondly
, an individual can conveniently
work
 either from home or outside their offices.
Finally
,
people
 can easily go around and be from one place to another in a short period of
time
 by using fast transport
such
 as speed trains, planes, and fast cars. In conclusion,
Correct word choice
apply
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while
, I acknowledge the merit of the disadvantages of modernization since it might lead to
misused
Replace the word
misuse
show examples
, which is certain to happen.
Nonetheless
, the advantages of its innovation are far greater as it allows many individuals to have quality
time
 with their friends and family near or far, and the
work
 convenience it can bring.
Submitted by lsc_00000 on

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task response
Ensure that your ideas directly address the given prompt throughout the essay. Discuss both advantages and disadvantages and come to a clear conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to use cohesive devices such as transition words, pronouns, and referencing to connect ideas within and between sentences and paragraphs.
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