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Writing Samples
Band 6

Many people now have the freedom to work and live anywhere because of advances in communication technology and transportation. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages.

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Nowadays, the advancement of technology brought a lot of convenience to
people
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 as they can
work
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 and live at whichever
time
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 and place they want to be.
This
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 innovation in our communication and transportation allows an individual to manage
time
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 effectively and
work
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 flexibly. I would argue that the advantages it brings to a person's life outweigh the disadvantages. On one hand, modernization affects the
life
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lives
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 of many individuals negatively as it has a destructive force ,especially for young adults. Even though the internet is an effective tool to bridge the gap between families staying in different locations and timelines,
however
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, the misuse of its application could ruin relationships and image in the social community. Facebook Messenger and
tiktok
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TikTok
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 apps,
for instance
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, are often used by many cybercriminals to conduct human trafficking and prostitution because of uncontrolled and unsupervised posting, and video streaming .
Thus
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, becoming the venue of online crimes and cyberbullying. In spite of the negative effects, it cannot be denied that there are many positive contributions brought by
this
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 development.
People
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 can
work
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 anywhere and anytime and are openly available to their families and friends at their own convenience because of the internet and innovative transport.
Firstly
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, it allows
people
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 to connect and reconnect with their distant loved ones, relatives or friends.
Secondly
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, an individual can conveniently
work
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 either from home or outside their offices.
Finally
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,
people
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 can easily go around and be from one place to another in a short period of
time
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 by using fast transport
such
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 as speed trains, planes, and fast cars. In conclusion,
Correct word choice
apply
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while
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, I acknowledge the merit of the disadvantages of modernization since it might lead to
misused
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misuse
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, which is certain to happen.
Nonetheless
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, the advantages of its innovation are far greater as it allows many individuals to have quality
time
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 with their friends and family near or far, and the
work
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 convenience it can bring.

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task response
Ensure that your ideas directly address the given prompt throughout the essay. Discuss both advantages and disadvantages and come to a clear conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to use cohesive devices such as transition words, pronouns, and referencing to connect ideas within and between sentences and paragraphs.
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