In modern society, it is possible to go shopping, work, and accommodate via the Internet without face-to-face contact with one another. To what extent do you think this is a positive or negative development.

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The population who conduct their daily tasks on the internet is growing in size, from online shopping to remote working and studying, the advanced technologies even make it possible for patients to see their doctors in the virtual world. Despite various merits derived from

such

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phenomena, I could partially see

such

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changes as a positive development

due to

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the hazards which cause financial loss,

along with

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physical harm in human societies.

To begin

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with, employees and students benefit from working and studying from home since they are able to save commuting time for better usage.

Furthermore

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, companies and educational institutions could gain advantages with lower environmental maintenance fees.

That is

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why a growing number of companies tend to provide more job positions for long-distance work. On top of that, spending money could never be easier with the help of advanced technology, consumers are able to satisfy their needs for products and services without leaving their rooms.

For example

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, people who love reading now could download digital books on the internet

instead

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of waiting for days for the printed books to arrive.

However

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, people should not overlook the negative effects on health caused by long screen time, including obesity and eye problems. Take Taiwan as an example, a statistic conducted a few years ago show a surge of young individuals who suffer from being overweight, which could lead to various illness

such

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as diabetes and cardiovascular diseases.

Moreover

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, the cases of cyber scams are on the rise

while

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more and more users choose to make online payments, which makes victims endure great financial loss. For, instance, one pensioner in Singapore lost all his savings by providing his personal details to criminals. To summarise, it is inevitable that the number of users in the virtual world will continuously grow based on its positive effects, reversely, it provokes many drawbacks to health and financial aspects.

Therefore

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, I could partially agree that

such

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changes are a positive development.

unapoya0916Wed Apr 26 2023

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

324 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

online shopping
remote work
virtual meetings
contactless transactions
convenience
accessibility
efficiency
time-saving
globalization
cultural exchange
social interaction
fraud
misuse
dependency
technology

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In modern society, it is possible to go shopping, work, and accommodate via the Internet without face-to-face contact with one another. To what extent do you think this is a positive or negative development.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to cooperate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both views and give your own opinio

These days, more people are going to university than in the past. They start work later in life and with higher qualifications. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this situation?

It is the responsibility of school to teach children good behaivour aside formal education. To what extent do you agree and disagree?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?