The graph below shows information on employment rates across 6 countries in 1995 and 2005.

The graph below shows information on employment rates across 6 countries in 1995 and 2005.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The bar chart illustrates the proportion of the working sectors
over
Change preposition
in
show examples
6 countries in 1995 and 2005.
Overall
Linking Words
, there had been a surge in employment rates from 1995 to 2005, for both males and females.
However
Linking Words
, in 2005, more men were being hired compared to women in all countries. In the year 1995, there were generally less than 50% female workers, except for Switzerland and the UK. Only around 25% of females were making an income in Australia and New Zealand. In the year 2005, the rate of employment of women increased by at least 10%, reaching heights of close to 70% in Switzerland.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the most dramatic rise took place in New Zealand, which achieved more than 40%. The average rate of employment of males in 1995 is approximately 60%,
where
Correct word choice
which
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
was lower than those of females in Switzerland,
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
and
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
. In 2005, there had been a major rise in the percentage of
working class
Add a hyphen
working-class
show examples
men, soaring up to more than 80% in Iceland, which was the highest compared to other countries.
Submitted by keecheepheng on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • employment rates
  • economic indicators
  • comparison
  • trends
  • improvements
  • declines
  • anomalies
  • fluctuating
  • economic policy
  • financial conditions
  • technological advancements
  • educational levels
  • standards of living
  • poverty rates
  • well-being
  • implications
What to do next:
Look at other essays: