Shops should not be allowed to sell any food or drinks that have been scientifically proven to be bad for people’s health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#shops #food #drinks #people’s #health

Shops should not have permission for selling any

food

or drinks that can create bad effects on human health. I strongly agree with

this

statement and the reason will be explained in the essay.

To begin

with, nowadays,

people

are consuming more junk

food

and sugary beverages than before and those are factors that increased the rate of obesity and diabetes in

this

period.

Therefore

, banning products that cause those is one way to solve

this

issue, seeing that the factor that rises the amount of those is

people

can access those products easily.

For example

, there are various kinds of fast

food

such

as ice cream and fried in stores ,there is no shop like

this

in the past.

Moreover

, most shops are open 24 hours so they can buy at any time and that makes

people

have bad habits.

However

,some propose they have the right to select what they eat since those

food

and drinks are tasteful. In my perspective,

although

those are delicious, safety is more crucial.

In addition

, I believe that there are new innovations happen in every day.

Hence

, foods and drinks that are good for human health and

also

have a good taste can be created. In conclusion, those are reasons why shops should not be allowed to sell those. In my opinion, if

people

can not access products easily , the risk of having those diseases will be reduced

Submitted by nuchnapa.anna on Sun May 07 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

236 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Regulations
accountability
retailers
public health
consumer choice
diet
banning
health education
awareness campaigns
economic impact
job losses
small businesses
complexity
beneficial
harmful
quantity consumed
individual health conditions

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Shops should not be allowed to sell any food or drinks that have been scientifically proven to be bad for people’s health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that one should retire at the age of 60 or 65. Others say that people should be allowed to work for as long as they want to. What is your opinion about this?

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people Why might this be the cause? Do you think this is a positive or a negative situation?

Learning to manage money is one of the key a aspects of adult life. How in your view can individuals best learn to manage their money

As well as making money, businesses have social responsibilities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Governments must invest this money in public services instead