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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Many children are encouraged to do part time work by parents? What are the advantages and disadvantages?

#children #part #time #work #parents
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In
this
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 contemporary era, many offspring are motivated by their guardians to do part-time jobs so that they can be self-reliant and learn new things. In
this
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 essay, we will elucidate the advantages and disadvantages of
this
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 development. To commence, the benefits that children gain from working are financial independence and the development of skills. To explain, when youngsters
work
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, they are able to manage their expenses and become economically stable to fulfil their wants. It
also
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 creates a less monetary burden on the parents as children can save their earnings for the future.
Furthermore
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, when adolescents step out into the outer world they develop and learn new skills which make them confident. It
also
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 boosts their social and problem-solving abilities as they face novel challenges on a daily basis. To exemplify, a child can save up their income for any recreational activity that they want to pursue.
Thus
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, the above example vividly illustrates the pros of
this
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 development. On the flip side, a child might have to face some hurdles
while
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 working
such
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 as lagging behind in academics and maintaining a
work
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-life balance. To explicate, the time they devote to their
work
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 would reduce their study time and they could get lower grades in school which would affect their self-esteem.
Moreover
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, it could get complicated for them to manage their
work
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-life balance as coping with school, family and
work
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 could get stressful for them at
such
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 a tender age.
For example
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, studies show that people who multi-task reported high anxiety levels than individuals who focussed on one thing at a time.
Hence
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, the aforementioned reason substantiates the shortcomings of youngsters who
work
Use synonyms
 part-time. To recapitulate, working part-time can benefit a child in becoming independent and improving their social and cognitive skills.
However
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, they might encounter complications in their academics and
also
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 find it difficult to cope with their lifestyle.
Submitted by sanchidhupar96 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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