IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people suggest that a country should try to produce all the food for its population and import as little food as possible. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #country #food #population #import
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Some people believe the governing bodies of a country should try to limit the import of international food and try to produce all items within the realm.
Although
this
 promotes the economic growth of the nation by minimising the expensive imports, I strongly disagree with
this
 as it poses more problems than solutions. One
such
 problem is depriving the nation of a balanced diet that comes from ingredients from all over the world. Local
produces are
Correct subject-verb agreement
produce is
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 beneficial both to farmers and to the government for multiple reasons.
Firstly
, it helps farmers with opportunities
of increasing
Change preposition
to increase
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 their income in order to fulfil their homeland's demand.
Secondly
, it becomes easy to analyze the demand based on a populace, which in turn drives the supply of the products ensuring minimal food waste.
For example
,
this
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apply
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due
to
Verb problem
apply
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can prove to improve the economy as both local production and consumption can effectively restore cash flow.
However
, the world is vast with distinct landscapes and climatic conditions scattered across different countries.
This
 makes it impossible to grow all the vegetables and cattle to meet the nutritional needs of the human body.
This
 is the reason, international food is a must-have for sustainable development.
For instance
, Greenland survives largely on imported foods;
this
 is because it is impossible to grow vegetables or farm animals
due to
 its severe cold weather. To summarize, feeding a population with local produce is suggested as it contributes towards the growth of a community. It
also
 reduces cross-country dependencies and aims at financial improvement. I,
however
, completely disagree as it might lead to depriving folks of all the vitamins and minerals which might not be possible to grow
due to
 the climatic conditions of a region.
Submitted by sanu.das92 on

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coherence logical structure
Try to enhance the logical connection between ideas, especially within paragraphs. For instance, when introducing a new point, make sure it links well with the preceding sentence or idea.
coherence supported main points
Ensure that each paragraph clearly supports the thesis and transitions smoothly from one idea to the next to improve the flow of the essay.
coherence introduction conclusion present
The introduction clearly outlines the main thesis of the essay, and the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points.
task achievement complete response
Provides a complete response to the question, weighing both benefits and drawbacks of producing all food domestically.
task achievement relevant specific examples
Includes relevant and specific examples, such as the mention of Greenland's reliance on imported food.
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