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Writing Samples
Band 6

Today, majority of children are raised by their grandparents due to the fact that their parents are busy working. To what extent do you think that it affects the whole family?

#majority #children #grandparents #fact #parents
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Children
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 nowadays feel much distracted and irritated by the fact that they get less attention from their
parents
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.
Children
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 are so delicate and are the sole responsibility of their
parents
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. They easily lose heart and believe they are less valuable to their
parents
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 since
parents
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 are busy making their lives going on in the most comfortable setting. I believe that it affects a child's development in the most harmful way. Owning to increased prices and an inflated economy, the cost of living is so high that individual has to work anyhow, they don't have any option other than to work.
Consequently
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,
parents
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 have to leave their
children
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 with their
grandparents
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 so they can earn for their family.
This
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 creates a ruckus in the minds of
children
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 that money is pivotal in their parent's life and they do not love them.
Secondly
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,
children
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 have enormous energy. They always demand engagement from their caretakers which they don't find in their
grandparents
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due to
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 their old age.
Thus
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,
children
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 feel irritated and rather use their energy on playing games on mobile phones and watching TV cartoons.
This
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 hinders the mental
as well as
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 physical growth of
children
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. The drawbacks of
parents
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 not giving enough time to their
children
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 affect the whole family adversely as
grandparents
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 started to feel lethargic and they start ignoring their grandchild over the period.
On the other hand
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,
children
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 developed feelings that nobody loves them and on the
parents
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' ,side they always remain guilty of the same. In conclusion, I can reaffirm that
children
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 raised by their
grandparents
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 often lack concentration and are less motivated to be engaged in physical outdoor games and are more attracted to screens. The adverse effect on the whole family results in depression, autism in
children
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 and many other issues.
Submitted by simranjeetkaur.86.68 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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