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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages

#children #hours #smartphones
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Nowadays
children
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 waste their time by playing with their phones and it creates certain drawbacks.
This
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 essay will examine the advantages and disadvantages of smartphone effects on
children
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 and provide a logical conclusion. The two main advantages of
phone
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 use are that it can improve
children
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's thinking and
also
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 increases their vocabulary.
Firstly
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,
children
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 usually play games on their
phone
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 and these days there are a lot of logic games that test the analytical thinking of the player by solving the game mission or riddle that lead to the improvement of kids' problem-solving skills.
Secondly
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, it provides a lot of sources that introduce
children
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 to many new vocab,
for example
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 by reading books on the
internet
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 they can find new words and search for the meaning of the word right away with the browser.
However
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,
phone
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 addiction
also
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 has major disadvantages like
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children’s
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 full dependency on the
internet
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 and their procrastination of important activities. Becoming too addicted to smartphones can make
children
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 believe everything they heard on the
internet
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, especially these days hoax news has spread widely. What’s more, parents are struggling to make their
children
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 do any productive activities because they choose to spend their time playing with their phones
instead
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 and so many of them are struggling to finish their homework on time, which can cause academic failure.
However
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, proper parent supervision of their kids'
phone
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 usage can eliminate the disadvantages.
To conclude
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,
although
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children’s
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phone
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 addiction has certain drawbacks like dependability on the
internet
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 and procrastination, it has an extremely positive impact on
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children’s
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 way of thinking and provides them with new knowledge of words. I believe that the benefit of
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children’s
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phone
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 addiction outweigh its drawbacks
Submitted by rahmatikaislamia on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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