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Band 6.5

Waking is known to be healthy for human health, and yet fewer people walk these days. What are the reasons and solutions?

#health #people
Generally, walking has many many advantages for health, but these
days
people
 do not walk as they used to be in the past.
This
 is mainly because everyone can drive these
days
 and
work
 from house. There are a number of solutions which should be implemented to deal with
people
 who walk less.
Firstly
, the reason why most
people
 do not walk a lot is that they use cars every single
time
.
In other words
, they use cars to
move
 everywhere they want,
as a result
, they do not need to walk anymore.
For example
, if they want to go to the beach, they go by car, and when they arrive, they lay under the sunshine, so they do not
move
 a lot.
Secondly
,
people
Add the comma(s)
,people
show examples
 these
days
 prefer to
work
 online. They do not
move
 to their companies, shops, or anywhere they
work
 because they are able to do their
work
 from their houses.
Also
, they do not need to
move
 with their customers to show them their products.
As a result
, when individuals do not walk they will be lazy already. There are two solutions to the problem of less walking. One way to tackle
this
 is to ensure that pushing
people
 to walk will help them without any negative reactions. To put it in another way, the government can ban cars to
move
 in the cities, and
people
 should walk in cities, and they can make new streets for walking, they should make special streets clean and long with flowers and rare plants. By doing
this
 it will help
people
 to walk with a good feeling. Another method of dealing with
people
 who
work
 from their homes. They can
work
 in their companies about three
days
 a week. They are able to organize their
time
 and spend some
time
 with their friends and family in the parks.
This
 solution would hopefully to walk with full desire. In conclusion, pushing
people
 to walk and organize their
time
 are effective in dealing with
this
 issue. If the government and individuals implemented these solutions.
People
 would walk more.
Submitted by s_syedy on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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