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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

People in the community can buy cheaper products nowadays. Do advantages outweigh disadvantages?

The demand for cheaper brands is rising smoothly among socialites these days,
while
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 the number of jobless is increasing at the same time.
While
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 I
recognize
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recognise
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 that there are a number of disadvantages, I believe that they are outweighed by the advantages. There are a few benefits to buying inexpensive goods.
Firstly
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,
this
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 trend could be beneficial to people of all levels.
For example
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, those who have a lower income can buy a smart TV, an air conditioner, and so on without thinking about the price to adapt to their basic needs.
Secondly
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, when individuals are given cheaper
items
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, the largest benefit is that they save a significant amount of money on everyday expenditures, which they can
then
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 spend on other essential elements
such
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 as education, travel, and housing.
On the other hand
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, there are undoubtedly certain drawbacks to purchasing lower-cost products. It goes without saying that buyers should evaluate brand quality. To create low-cost
items
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, a firm may use cheap labour, and
as a result
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, it is not guaranteed that the
items
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 it produces will be low-cost. People who use
such
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 a commodity for an extended period of time are certainly at risk of developing health concerns
such
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 as cancer.
Furthermore
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, cheap, low-quality crops are extremely risky for students who have been studying at school, college, or university. They need to buy lunch
as a consequence
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 of their financial problems. To
summarize
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summarise
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, I believe that the benefits of buying cheaper
items
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 for consumers and the economy have more than compensated for the disadvantages.

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task
State your view in a clear line in the first sentence. Then add points that back this view one by one.
task
Give more exact proof for each point. Use a real example or clear detail to show why a point is true.
coherence
Make a smooth flow between parts. Use easy link words like also, but, because to join ideas.
coherence
Keep one main idea in each paragraph. Do not mix ideas in one part.
structure
Clear view is stated in the start and restated at the end.
coherence
Good use of simple link words to show order and contrast.
content
Some relevant ideas and examples are shown for the issue.
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