Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#world #adults #home #children #study #technology #development

With the development of science and technology, working and studying virtually from

home

or anywhere has become a trend.

People

become aware that

access

Wrong verb form

accessing

show examples

lesson

Fix the agreement mistake

lessons

show examples

and job

task

Fix the agreement mistake

tasks

show examples

can be less costly and less

time consuming

Add a hyphen

time-consuming

show examples

when they do it from their comfort areas

such

home

, cafe, or library rather than

participate

Wrong verb form

participating

show examples

onsite. In my opinion,

this

trend can bring both positive and negative development

depend

Wrong verb form

depending

show examples

on how

people

deal with their flexibility and priority. On the one hand, completing

job

Add an article

the job

a job

show examples

from

home

will allow

people

to be more relaxed and manage their

work

time

wisely.

People

who

work

from

home

will not rush

with

Change preposition

show examples

the morning hours and compete with the traffic problem.

Moreover

, they will manage to do many other activities

such

as preparing for breakfast, working out, or simply driving their

children

to school.

Similarly

children

who take

online

Add an article

the online

show examples

class

Fix the agreement mistake

classes

show examples

will not have the problem to be woken up

abbruptedly

Correct your spelling

abruptly

by their parents every morning just to get ready for school.

Children

may be allowed to opt what subjects and what

time

they want to start the lesson.

On the other hand

, working and studying remotely

also

have some drawbacks

such

as the distractions of unplanned activities or unavoidable situations at

home

that will lead to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

incomplete tasks or disorganizing

work

. Working from

computer

Add an article

a computer

the computer

show examples

home

or anywhere else other

Change preposition

than that

show examples

that

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

office will

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

free up

people

Change noun form

people's

show examples

pressure to complete

ourthe

Correct your spelling

our

jobs in the meantime.

Therefore

people

often postpone their

work

to do other unpredicted things that

are suddenly appear

Change the verb form

suddenly appear

show examples

during their

work

hours.

For example

, a female teacher who teaches from

home

will set the

time

to not only teach

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

do the housework.

nNot

Correct your spelling

Not

to mention the distractions from

children

after they return from school will certainly affect

the

Change the word

their

show examples

work

time

Furthermore

, students who learn remotely sometimes get distracted by their little siblings or by their smartphones. In

this

case, they will not pay much attention to the lesson and have difficulties

engage

Wrong verb form

engaging

show examples

in learning.

To sum up

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

long distance

Add a hyphen

long-distance

show examples

working and learning

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

been a popular development among modern

people

. In my opinion,

this

trend can be up and down

depends

Wrong verb form

depending

show examples

on how

people

manage their

time

and priority.

Submitted by ieltscuns2022 on Sun Jun 18 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
27Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

369 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

remote work
e-learning
accessibility
inclusive
productivity
personalized learning
disciplined routine
interpersonal skills
cybersecurity
sustainability
work-life balance
physical disabilities

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