IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

With the increased global demand in oil and gas, undiscovered areas of the world should be opened up to access more resources. To what extent do you agree?

#demand #oil #gas #areas #world #access #resources
In the modern era, there is a huge debate about the demand for
oil
 and
gas
 is increasing day by day.
However
, the government wants to give access to companies for finding more resources from undiscovered areas. A large group of people think in its favour.
While
 others have the opposite opinion. The upcoming paragraphs will shed light on my personal opinion with a suitable example. I agree with the statement nowadays,
oil
 and
gas
 are demanding and there are not enough resources to
fulfil
 the requirements in the future. There are numerous reasons why I am in favour of it. The most important reason is the consumption of
oil
 and
gas
 at the top of the list.
In other words
, all over the world
oil
 and
gas
 is the main thing that uses globally.
Moreover
, to
fulfil
 future requirements the government should be allowed to open undiscovered areas for searching new resources of
oil
 and
gas
. It means that with the help of new discoveries, people
fulfil
 their needs in the future. I would like to give a reason to explain my perspective.
Further
, everything depends on
oil
 and
gas
 to justify my perception, I would like to give an example of a serve which use conducted by Sydney University in 2014. The survey revealed the findings that
oil
 and
gas
 are directly proportional to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
inflation.
On the contrary
, some people oppose the above statement for several reasons, because they believe that
gas
 and
oil
 should be replaced with new technologies.
In addition
, nowadays, many companies are making electric cars to reduce the consumption of
oil
 and
gas
. Tesla is the biggest company to manufacture electric cars.
Furthermore
, solar panels have
also
introduced
Add a missing verb
been introduced
show examples
 in the world to
fulfil
 the requirements in lieu of
oil
 and
gas
. To recapitulate,
according to
 the arguments aforementioned above. One can reach the conclusion that the benefits of the topic are indeed too great to ignore.
Submitted by ahsanislam96 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • global demand
  • finite resources
  • energy consumption
  • exploiting
  • untouched ecosystems
  • carbon emissions
  • climate change
  • renewable energy
  • sustainable energy solutions
  • geopolitical consequences
  • territorial disputes
  • dependency
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