Nowadays online shopping is extremely popular. Discuss the impact of it on the environment and on people who lost their jobs because of it.
As time goes by, online shopping is gaining popularity.
However
, there is growing debate over whether online shopping is good or not for people and the environment. In my opinion, online shopping has advantages and disadvantages.
On the one hand, the quality of human life has increased significantly by online shopping, such
as Amazon. Because of convenience and simplicity. Above all
, people can save a lot of energy and time by using online shopping. According to
a survey, the number of online shopping users increased exponentially between 2010 and 2022. This
data reflects the critical impact of online shopping.
On the other hand
, online shopping has disadvantages as well. There is no denying that due to
the development of online services, the range of transportation became active. Because the more customers purchase goods or items online, the more manufacturers use a wide range of transportation for quick services. Therefore
, the natural environment can be polluted by toxic emissions from cars, planes and ships. For example
, such
as Alibaba and Amazon are working on the process in order to realize the scale of the economy by combining online networks and they are planning to replace their factory system with a robot automation system. In the end, many employees might be fired and a lot of jobs would be disappearing. Because many companies always want to operate it efficiently. The results came from the benefits of online shopping.
In summary, this
tendency might be controversial for some people and for the reasons above, the public still argues that this
change is going to be truly meaningful and helpful for individuals and associations.Submitted by ryujaekwang0928 on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that the essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. Each part should be well-defined and serve its purpose. The introduction should set the stage for the discussion, the body should delve into detailed arguments, and the conclusion should summarize and restate your position.
coherence cohesion
Develop main points with specific details and examples. The main points in your essay are mentioned but not elaborated with sufficient details or examples that are specific and relevant to the topic. Use clear examples to support your arguments and enhance the depth of your essay.
task achievement
The response should thoroughly address all parts of the task. The essay does address the popularity of online shopping and its effects, but it falls short of a complete response due to a lack of focus on specific impacts on the environment and people's jobs in-depth. Ensure to fully address all components of the task given in the prompt.
task achievement
Ideas should be clear and comprehensive throughout the essay. While you have presented a few points, strive for greater clarity and in-depth exploration of ideas. Avoid making broad statements without substantiating them with a thorough explanation.
task achievement
Include relevant, specific examples to strengthen your arguments. The examples provided in your essay are too general and do not effectively support the discussion points. Providing factual, precise, and relevant examples creates a stronger impact and demonstrates a better understanding of the topic.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?