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Band 5.5

People nowadays sleep less than they used to in the past. What do you think is the reason behind this? What are the effects on individuals and people around them?

#people #reason #effects #individuals
Sleeping less is becoming more widespread in many parts of the world these days.
This
 essay will examine the causes
as well as
 the effects related to
this
 tendency. There are a variety of different causes for
this
 matter.
To begin
 with, the main cause of poor sleep is a
lot
 of
work
 that
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
 to be done urgently. For
examples
Fix the agreement mistake
example
show examples
, my aunt’s company assign a
lot
 of
work
 during the day and needs to be completed urgently by
afternoon
Add an article
an afternoon
the afternoon
show examples
 of the next day. Another contributing factor to mention is the abuse of stimulants
such
 as coffee, tea, and alcohol. High caffeine lead to difficulty sleeping. For
examples
Fix the agreement mistake
example
show examples
, my father is very addicted to coffee. Drank a
lot
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
causing nervous excitement fatigue. Unexpectedly, there are some serious effects
consequences
Correct word choice
and consequences
show examples
 to be concerned. The first and most important is cause memory loss. During sleep, the brain stores memories. If you are sleep deprived, the storage process can be disrupted leading to memory loss. For
examples
Fix the agreement mistake
example
show examples
, my friend didn't get enough sleep so he forgot to do his homework when he came to class. Another effect no less important is that
to
Correct your spelling
it
show examples
 cause
work
 delays.
For example
, my aunt has to finish the
work
 before tomorrow, she will finish it one day. In conclusion, sleeping less is a big problem that
affecting
Wrong verb form
affects
show examples
 a
lot
 of people nowadays. It’s mainly caused by
Correct article usage
the abused
show examples
abused
Change the form of the verb
abuse
show examples
 of stimulants . From what has been discussed, sleeping less
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is advised
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
to
work
 and rest properly.
Submitted by yeshomeclass on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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